Growing Up

Today was pretty spectacular. Church was fabulous. I always love fast and testimony meeting. Aside from the many, many wonderful blessings that come from fasting, I think I would fast solely to get to listen to my friends share their testimonies. I always feel so uplifted by the things they say. It's nice to have your greatest examples be your closest friends. I love BYU.

After church we had a floor meeting about off campus housing. Things are getting crazy. I have to make so many difficult decisions in such a short amount of time. On one hand, it is super exciting and I feel like such a grown up. On the other hand, I am terrified to be making such life changing decisions. I've mostly been looking at apartments online, but tomorrow just might be the big day: the day I venture out and look at apartments in person.

Thankfully I was able to eat a big bowl of ice cream at dinner to drown all my apartment choosing fears. Ice cream solves pretty much every problem. Except obesity.

This evening my ward had a fireside about temples. It was super good. I learned a lot about symbols on/in the temple that I never knew before. Temples are so rich in symbolism and I am excited and eager to learn more. I can't wait for the day when I get to go through the temple and receive my endowments -and be sealed to my eternal companion. The future is so exciting! And terrifyingly near. But for now I will just do my best to prepare and not worry about what the future holds.

Growing up is an interesting thing. When you're in kindergarten, the fifth graders seem so old. When you're in fifth grade, junior high schoolers are the old ones. And in junior high the high schoolers are the big kids. Now I am the ultimate big kid. College kid. So when will I start to feel like a big kid? Will I be 50 years old and still waiting to feel like a grown up? I guess in some ways I do feel grown up. Like with looking at apartments. But mostly I feel like a little school girl who is playing dress up and this is all just make believe. But this isn't make believe. This is my life. And the decisions I make right now will affect the rest of my life eternity. It's a bit intimidating. And really exciting.

Here's to 2012: the year I will sign a contract for my first apartment, turn 20, and maybe finally feel like a big kid (HA! Who am I kidding? I'll always be 12.)